As a working mother, it’s easy to feel like you’re constantly juggling a million things. From managing your career to caring for your family, the list never seems to end. It’s no surprise that many of us equate being busy with being stressed. However, what if I told you that being busy isn’t the real problem?
The Myth of Busyness
We live in a world that often glorifies busyness and it can be easy to "blame" our busyness for our feelings of stress, lethargy or even unhappiness, when in fact, the stress and burnout many working mothers experience often stem from a deeper issue—misalignment between our actions and our values.
1. Misalignment of Values
When our daily actions don’t align with our core values, we feel conflicted and stressed. We might be spending our time and energy on tasks and goals that don’t resonate with what truly matters to us. This misalignment creates a sense of dissatisfaction and unease.
A study by the Harvard Business Review found that 60% of working mothers feel they have to compromise their values to succeed at work. This can lead to feelings of frustration and stress because we’re not living in accordance with our true selves.
2. Lack of a Clear Strategy
Another common issue is the lack of a clear strategy. Without a strategic plan for our lives and careers, we tend to drift aimlessly, feeling unfulfilled and frustrated. We might be working hard, but without a clear direction, it’s challenging to see the impact of our efforts.
Research by Forbes indicates that 70% of women who have a clear career strategy report higher job satisfaction. Having a strategy not only helps in achieving career goals but also in maintaining a work-life balance.
3. Ignoring Self-Care
Self-care is often the first thing to be sacrificed when we’re busy. However, neglecting our own needs can lead to stress and burnout. Self-care isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity for managing stress and staying aligned with our goals. According to the American Psychological Association, 77% of women report experiencing physical symptoms of stress due to lack of self-care. When we ignore our well-being, we’re unable to show up fully for our careers, families, and ourselves.
The Real Culprit: Misaligned Priorities
The root of the problem isn’t how busy we are; it’s how aligned our priorities are with our values and goals. If we don’t take the time to identify what truly matters to us, we end up feeling overwhelmed and unfulfilled, regardless of how organised our schedules are. Why now as a working mother? The problem most of us face as working mothers is once we return to work we start treading water, we have so much more to think about that we naturally fall into survival-mode and we often don't take the time to reflect and reassess how our needs and wants might have changed. Remember, this is a huge life change and it deserves your attention. This is a non-negotiable and often underrated element of self care!
So, how can we move beyond the busyness and focus on what truly matters? Here are a few steps to help you align your life with your values and goals:
1. Reflect on Your Values and Priorities
Take some time to think about what’s truly important to you. What are your core values? What are the non-negotiables in your life? Understanding your values is the first step in aligning your actions with them.
2. Set Realistic Goals That Align with Your Values
Once you’ve identified your values, set realistic goals that reflect them. Whether it’s spending more quality time with your family, pursuing a career that fulfills you, or dedicating time to self-care, make sure your goals align with what you value most.
3. Create a Plan to Integrate Self-Care into Your Routine
Self-care is essential for managing stress and staying aligned with your goals. Create a plan to incorporate self-care into your daily routine. This might include exercise, meditation, or simply taking time to relax and recharge.
It’s time to move beyond the busyness and focus on what truly matters. By aligning your values, setting a clear strategy, and prioritising self-care, you can reduce stress and create a more fulfilling life. Remember, you deserve a life that reflects your values and aspirations.
By taking the time to reflect on what matters most, setting realistic goals, and prioritising self-care, we can create a life that is not only busy but also meaningful and satisfying.